Violence becomes her

I keep finding myself internalizing the violence inflicted upon me. The moment an abuser comes to the forefront of my mind, crosshaired in my viewfinder or creeping up the spine of my sentient memories is when the loathing roars it’s head. Worthless Nothing Shit. I find my mind jumping to suicide. Itching for release. If […]

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It’s astonishing

Really. You picked me. Everyday. You choose me. Everynight. You make me Human And full of possibility. You love me When I least deserve it. When my heart is polluted with hate. You hold me When the world shatters and I keep stepping on broken pieces. You stand by me. When I try to break […]

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I’m still pissed

and it’s making me anxious. I can’t stop obsessing. I can’t get over the hurt. I’m pissed off…still. even though I thought I thoroughly examined the incident. I thoroughly examined my feelings. my actions. my intentions.   and yet I am so fucking pissed. She claims to empower women but she will stab them the […]

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Accept it

good things are happening to you even if shit is flying everywhere else in the world and you’re pretty sure the world is going to end sooner rather than later   GOOD THINGS ARE HAPPENING. and there’s nothing wrong with you. you deserve progress. success. a team of people behind you who WANT to work […]

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daddy was on the phone

telling me that I could make it through the semester that I would survive the withdrawal that I could handle 12, 8, 6 more weeks of torture that if I finished the semester I would have an easier time finding a job an easier time transferring colleges he saw klonopin withdrawal in residency and, because […]

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to be

lynched by your own humanity gutted by the hands of human kindness and split open for the world to devour your innards is the only thing you think you will not be able to survive but when you do come to and the light shines directly into your eyes and you’re crying back tears not […]

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